True Contentment and Satisfaction: What the Psychologists Won’t Tell You

1 Timothy 6:6-8 ~ Yet true religion with contentment is great wealth. After all, we didn’t bring anything with us when we came into the world and we certainly cannot carry anything with us when we die. So if we have enough food and clothing, let us be content.

What is the reason why most people are stressed? We’re not content. We don’t like our job, we don’t make enough money, we want a bigger house or live in a better neighborhood. We want a newer car. We want to be more popular or we want to go to a better school. The list goes on and on. We spends hundreds of dollars on psychologists that tell us when we get to the top of the corporate ladder we will be happy, when we find the love of our life we will be satisfied. We spend countless hours at the golf course trying to “de-stress” our life, yet at the end of the day, we go to bed, still wanting more. The Bible however has a different idea for satisfaction, and it doesn’t include more stuff, a title before our name, a higher degree or a better paying job. Paul tells Timothy that we came here with nothing and we will leave with nothing. So why is it then that we stress to have the best and biggest thing? We are looking at this at the wrong perspective. Jesus’s famous words should be our goal, what we strive to do. “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal” ~ Matthew 6:19-20
Jesus knew the answer (go figure right?) The only true satisfaction comes from serving God. Nothing else will fill us up. We weren’t put on this earth to earn the most money or have the greatest job. We were created to serve God. And guess what? We don’t need a degree or a new car or a big house to serve God. All we need is a willing heart and a love for the people.
Beyond that, Jesus told his disciples that where our treasure is our heart will be there also. If we treausre our possessions, our job our (fill in the blank) more than we treasure our relationship with God, our heart will start ot lie with those things. our constant thought will be how we climb higher on the corporate ladder, how we can afford that newer house, etc. rather than how can we further the kingdom of God.
God has bestowed upon us countless blessings and once we realize what we do have, we tend to focus less on what we don’t have.
Things and people here on earth will disappoint us. They weren’t created to fulfill us. in fact their design was to let us down. If we could find satisfaction on earth what would be the purpose of our relationship with God? But when we can become truely content right where God has placed us, then we will find true satisfaction and joy. Godliness with contentment is great gain.

Walls: What are we really using them for?

So, I absolutely love it when I’m going through a situation and there’s a lesson attached to it (there usually is) and God really speaks to me. Its an awesome feeling finally realizing what the lesson is. So… my lesson for my current situation. Walls. Fun topic right? haha.

What happens when somebody hurts us? What do we do when something happens that crushs us? We might get angry for a while, we might go hide under a rock, but more than likely we vow that we will never get into that situation again. We build a wall around our heart. Whether it be a relationship, family, friends, whatever, we build walls. now I’m not saying that all walls are bad, in fact quite the opposite. The problem comes when you build walls for the wrong reasons and when you build wall upon wall upon wall so that no one can ever break through and you never experience life because you’re holding yourself captive.

Walls aren’t inherently bad. Actually they can be quite helpful. Jerusalem was always protected by a wall that God commanded them to build. This wasn’t because God wanted his people to live as hermits and be held captive. No, the wall made it so the gatekeepers could be selective about who came in. They could keep out the outright attacks from the enemy but they could also keep out the distractions that tried to enter. However the wall was nto meant to keep the whole world out.

In the same way , God wants us to guard our heart. Without some type of a wall our heart would be defenseless, open to attack from anything the world throws at us. However, we don’t need multiple walls with no way in. We just need the Holy Spirit standing as our gatekeeper being selective about who is allowed to enter. The quanity of walls, or the height or thickness of the wall is not what’s important. Its the quality of the wall. Its what exactly you are using to protect yourself. are you putting on a mask, giving a false impression that everything is fine while really you are hiding behind all these walls and barriers or are you really depending on the Lord? You may feel safer with tons of walls hiding yourself from the world, but really, what is more safe than leaning on your heavenly father who loves you so much and doesn’t want harm to come to you

What Makes A Person Attractive

In today’s society the idea of being attractive in the world’s eyes is becoming almost impossible to obtain. We are supposed to look to Hollywood for the definition of the word. We have hundreds of “celebrity diets” out there and fashion styles are only “in” if movie stars are seen in them. However I find it interesting that the biblical idea of the word is very different, in fact its the otherside of the spectrum. The Bible acutally never mentions outward appeance when speaking about attractiveness. King Solomon had quite a bit to say about this subject:
Proverbs 19:22 ~ Loyalty makes a person attractive and it is better to be poor than dishonest.
Solomon seems to say that attractiveness is a matter of the heart rather than appearance. And Solomon isn’t the only one!
1 Timothy 2:10 ~ For women who claim to be devoted to God should make themselves attractive by the good things they do.
So you see, the Bible doesn’t care about what people loook like on the outside. Its not about your outside appearance. Your beauty should be from your heart.
1 Peter 3:3-4 ~ Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty that depends on fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should be known for the beauty that comes from within, the the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is so precious to God.
Not only are we supposed to focus on the beauty of our heart, we are told not to concern ourselves with our outward beauty. So in a society where people are obsessed with being a “size 2″ the Bible has a different idea.

The Pain of Refining

This is something that my college pastor touched on at our bible study, and I started writing my thoughts about it down in my own words, really making it personal, so I thought I would share with y’all what I wrote

I started as a lump of raw material, something unusable and in desparate need of work. My heart’s desire is not to stay this useless piece of rock, but to become something beautiful and useful in God’s eyes. SOmething that God will smile at because he will be proud of his work. But this desire comes at a cost and sometimes I don’t know how great that cost really is. I ask God to work in my life, but then I am not comfortable with the areas of my life he wants to work on. I ask him to turn the fire up and then realize how hot God really wants the fire to be in order to remove the impurities from my life. And when I think that the fire couldn’t get any hotter and I can’t bear the pain any longer God turns it up just a little more, right to my breaking point. But thorughout it, the only promise I can hold ontois that God will not put me through a trial without giving me the strength to endre it. He believes in me, why shouldn’t I believe in myself? The God of the universe knows that I can make it through! Why should I have any doubt in myself? I have my creator giving me exactly the strength I need to go through each test.

What I find most difficult to understand is what God uses to refine me and bring me closer to him. Time and time again He has used the lives of those close to me to teach me something. Whether he completely strips them from my life or some other way, it is a difficult lesson to learn. The most painful though is when I am shown something in another person’s life, be it a relationship, success, you name it, and I think I want ti. It is only when I become aware of my coveting spirit that I realize that I don’t have X,Y, or Z because God doesn’t want me to have it right now. I won’t be able to to growo with that in my life and I will become stagnent. It is only after I realize all of this that God is able to work in my life and produce something positive from that test.

I think that God is continuously testing us, continuously turning up the heat. Sometimes however, there are times when the testing and the fire seem so much more present. For me, now is one of those times. I have never felt so strongly the constant struggles that I come in contact with and more than once I have wanted to buckle under the pressure and shy away from the intense heat searing through my worldly thoughts, killing away all that dead flesh. So many times I’ve wanted to hold onto the impurities that the fire is trying float to the top so God can clear them away. I hold onto the promise that God knows what he wants from me, and I am simply his workmanship, his creation. He has a design in mind that is more radical than I can even imagine and I know one day that I will be his completed project, a true miracle of God’s design. Because of that, I don’t want to fight the fire or push away from the pressure that God is placing in my life in order to shape me and purify me into what he wants

Can I Have it?

In so many ways we are like the prodigal son, but none more so than in the relationship arena. How many times do we find ourselves thinking that our timing is right, rather than God’s. For me personally, this story fits like a glove. Think of a relationship as the inheritance that is talked about in this parable. I remember the end of my freshman year of college, I met this guy that I really liked. He was a godly man and we clicked really well. I remember constantly asking God “Can I have him, please?”, much like a little kid in a pet store asking her mom for a puppy. (Yes, that was the visualization that God gave me when I was asking). At the time, I didn’t see anything wrong with asking. After all, the Bible says to ask and ye shall receive, and I was taking this to the Lord in prayer, something that was huge in my life. But as I look back on it, I see that my story sounds so much like the prodigal son. Know this and everything else will fall into place; God’s timing, and God’s timing alone is perfect. If we wait for Him, then we will be so blessed. Our inheritance will be what God intended it to be. However, if we ask for our inheritance prematurely, then first, the reward will not be the same. Sure, the relationship we may be in might be a blessing, but it isn’t all that God wanted. God is not selfish in that he doesn’t want to bless you and He doesn’t sit up in heaven saying “oh, she messed up today, she can’t be blessed”. Not at all. God is waiting for a reason to bless you, but in order to comprehend and fully receive the blessing, we have to be actively seeking God. The blessing of the inheritance for the prodigal son was short lived and unsatisfactory and for us too, our inheritance of a relationship will be unsatisfactory if we do not wait until God is ready to bestow it upon us.

Now, you might be in a completely different boat. You may know exactly what I was just talking about because you just experienced it first hand. You took the inheritance before it was time. Does this mean that you are now doomed to relationship failure or can never receive the blessing of a satisfying relationship? Of course not! Our father is always ready to receive us back with open arms as long as we run back to him.

My New Book: Dancing With God

So, I recently had this idea to write a book, and along with the help of two girls I go to school with, we will be doing it! The topic kind of falls under the category of “relationships” but at the same time, its different than those that I’ve seen before. The purpose of this book is to showing the reader to fall in love with God first, before trying to start a relationship with another person. Most of the books I’ve read before imply that the goal is to one day, find your perfect match, get married and life will be perfect, however, since when is a love here on earth the ultimate goal? Why is it that we fall in love with God, but when that person walks into our life, God once again gets put on the back burner. This book will focus intensely on the reason we were created; to be the bride of Christ and to worship him fully and completly.

Here are some of my notes that I’ve jotted down, so you get the idea of where my book is going. Please feel free to comment and give me advice or maybe an idea or testimony you have (I might just quote you!)

>God is to be our first love. Remember when you first accepted Christ and everything we did, we did because we simply loved God. We wanted to tell everyone and let them know who our God was. Go back to those days when you were just simply in love with God, when nothing else got in the way and Christ was always on the forefront of your mind. For most of you, if you haven’t personally experienced the dating world, you’ve seen it from the outside. Maybe you’ve had a friend that did the whole dating game. When your friend (or you) had a new boyfriend/girlfriend, what did they ALWAYS talk about? It wasn’t usually the weather or the big test coming up was it? No, probably not. It was what their boyfriend said on the phone last night, or how he smiled at her as they passed each other in the school hallway. You can always tell what a person’s passion is by what they constantly talk about and the way they live their life. So how cool would it be if our passion was Christ and all we did all day was tell people how awesome our God really is. I heard a story about a girl that was so deeply in love with Christ that she would go around telling her friends “God is so cute, guess what he did today”. Her relationship to God was a simple love for him and she talked about him just as though girls talk about their boyfriend. And while to some that may sound unbiblical and dishonoring, its actually not. We are the bride of Christ and he is our bridegroom, so why can’t our natural conversations start, end, and be completely encircled by God?

 

>God is selfish in the fact that He wants us to love only him before we can love another person. But really, that aspect is more beneficial to us. If we are not shown how to fully love Christ who was perfect, then we will never be able to love a human who is imperfect.

 

Please let me know what you think!

A Christ-Like Example in a “Christ-less” World part two

1 Timothy 4:12 (NKJV) ~ Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity

In the last post ( http://briannalynndavis.wordpress.com/2009/02/01/a-christ-like-example-in-a-christ-less-world-part-1/ ) I talked about the first thee things, in word; being what you talk about on a daily basis, in conduct; or in your actions; and in love; loving everyone, not just when its easy

So now we’ll talk about the last three!

4. In Spirit

This is more of a personal thing, that will just be shown in your life. When you are completely surrendered to Christ your life will be blessed, and others will see this and see that you are different from your classmates, your co-workers, etc. And guess what? Its not brain surgery to accomplish this! In fact, its rather simple. Completely rely on the Holy Spirit for everything and submit everything in your life over to Him. When you hold nothing back, your relationship is stronger and your life will be blessed, I promise. Its like a relationship among people, whether it be a romantic relationship or a friendship. Relationships don’t last when you don’t trust the other person. Secrets cannot be kept back and everything has to be surrendered in order to move forward together. it’s the same way with God.

5. In Faith

1 Peter 3:15 says “ But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to givea defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear” We have to know why we believe what we believe. Not only do we have to know, but we have to know that we know that we know that we know… ok you get the picture. When we are an examples in these areas we’ve discussed, we’re going be seen as different. We might be asked “well, why don’t you date” or why won’t you have a beer with us?” and right there, the door is opened to share the gospel. But if we’re not prepared, that door will slam closed again, hitting us in the face. So we must take those opportunities and use them to wisely. How do we do this? Like I said, its knowing what you believe and always being ready to give a defense when someone asks. Beyond that its knowing the truth and (get this, its important) sharing it in love. You cannot go around judging people saying “you’re wrong, this is what the Bible says, blah, blah, blah” and basically hitting people upside the head with scripture. Trust me, that’s not biblical, even if you can spout out Bible verses at the drop of a hat. If its not done in love, it shouldn’t be done at all. Forcing the truth down someone’s throat is not going to win them to the kingdom. The easiest way to execute being an example in faith is to know the word of God and simply live it out in reality rather than closing your Bible at the end of your devotions and going on with your life, not putting anything into practice that you just read.

6. In Purity

Ok, last one, and this one is probably the hardest one to talk about and probably even harder to live out. Living in close proximity to a college campus, I’m surrounded by people who don’t live this out. Pure and simple, they took something that was saved to be a wonderful gift for marriage, opened the gift early and will find that its not as satisfying as if they it would be had they waited on God’s timing. Remaining pure in today’s society is extremely hard, and God knows this, which is why God will bless those that keep the promise of remaining pure until marriage. Now I’m not going to go into this, that’s another topic entirely, but I will say that sexual sin can and will destroy your life. It was one of the sins that destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah and if not resolved will destroy you too.

In closing, remember this. Our home is not here, therefore we were placed on this earth to work. Christ came into this world to minister, not to fellowship or to “be cool” and we are to do the same. Christ ministered to EVERYONE and we are to follow that example. God desires for us to be set apart from this world. We won’t be perfect, we can’t be. But we need to ask for help. Rely completely on God and He will radically change your life.

A Christ-like Example in a Christ-less World part 1

1 Timothy 4:12 (NKJV) ~ Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity.

Most people that read this blog are fairly young, probably from late high school to recent college graduates, so I hope this verse speaks to you as much as it did to me. Growing up, and even recently, I had this thought that “Oh I know God will use me, but he wants me to graduate and get into the workforce first. Then I can be effective. I just have to be older.” Looking back, I know that was the devil and I know I probably missed opportunities to further the kingdom of God simply because I thought I wasn’t ready. The truth of the matter is though, no matter what our age, we CAN be effective for the Kingdom, simply by living our lives in a Christ-like manner. Paul uses the word “example” which literally means “a mold”. In this verse he lays out 6 things that we are to be an example in

1. In word

Here Paul is referring to both the written and the spoken word, which is basically, our daily conversations. What do we spend our time talking about on a daily basis. Do we spend time wasting away talking about useless things that we won’t remember the next day, or do we spend that time building each other up and living our life as a light? I challenge you, as I challenged myself as well, to really step back and look about what you talk about. Most of the time, we’re not even conscious of it, but when we examine what we are saying, then we are made aware of our mistakes. Proverbs 13:3 states “Those who control their tongue will have a long life; a quick retort can ruin everything.” In James 3 (no I won’t quote the entire chapter) it talks about the tongue as though it were a small flame of fire. He calls the tongue a small thing, but capable of enormous damage, able to ruin your whole life. In short, be mindful of what you say. You have no idea who is watching you and listening to what you say. You are ambassadors of the Lord wherever you go, and saying things that bring others down is not accurately portraying Christ. The prayer that David makes in Psalm 19:14 ties it up perfectly “May the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart be pleasing to you, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.

You might be saying, “Ok, but I’m not like that. I don’t have problems controlling my tongue, I dealt with that long ago. Ok, maybe that isn’t your problem. But if you are listening to others say these things, or if you laugh at a joke that isn’t wholesome, then you are approving of what is being said, and its really the same thing as saying them yourself.

2. In your conduct

Ok, plain English please? Request granted… In your actions. I’m sure you’ve heard the old saying “actions speak louder than words”. Everyone has, and everyone knows what it means, but for the sake of argument, I’m going to explain it anyways. Saying your going to do a task is only worth something if you actually follow through with it. Lofty promises mean nothing. Also, what you do, is much more of a revelation of who you are than just what you say. My pastor put it this way. Witness to everybody, when necessary, use words. You are a witness simply by the way you live. The places you go in your free time, your work ethic, how you present yourself all point to who you are as a person, and should point to who Christ is. I know, that homecoming party may sound really cool, and apparently only nobodies don’t show up, but what’s it worth? Christ died for your sin. Its not worth breaking God’s heart, just for that moment of earthly pleasure or for people to think you’re “cool”. God already calls you his child. Shouldn’t that be better than any title the world can give you?

3. In Love

This word originally translates to “agape love” which simply means, unconditional, self sacrificing love. The love that will take a bullet for a friend or family member that you love. Ok, that’s a good start, but as I said, its just a start. God doesn’t say “Love people, but only those who are easy to love or who love you back.” No God wants us to love EVERYONE as Christ loved the church. Wow. That’s difficult to swallow. Christ died for the church, so we have to die for someone who doesn’t know us, or worse, who hates us? Maybe not literally that extreme, but at least now you’re thinking on the right track. And yes, I understand that on our own strength its impossible to love those we hate. And God understands that too. Which is why we have to rely completely on him. We have to have the Lord’s love for those who are sometimes, well, difficult to love.

(Yes, I know how to count, part two is coming. Be watching for it!)

The Birdfeeder

I cannot take credit for writing this, but it was so true that I will haveto post it…

 

I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back  porch and filled it with seed.
 
 Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking  advantage of the continuous  flow of free and easily accessible food.
 
 But then the birds started building nests in  the boards of the patio, above  the table, and next to the barbecue.
 
 Then came the mess. It was everywhere: on the  patio tile, the chairs, the  table…everywhere.
 
 Then some of the birds turned mean:
  They would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket.
 
 And others birds were boisterous and loud: 
  They sat on the feeder and squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that I fill it when it got low on food.  
 
 After a while, I couldn’t even sit on my own back porch anymore.
 
 I took down the bird feeder and in three days the birds were gone.
 
 I cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio.
 
 Soon, the back yard was like it used to be…… quiet, serene and no one
 demanding their rights to a free meal.
 
 Now lets see……. our government gives out free food, subsidized housing, free medical care, free education and allows anyone born here to be an  automatic citizen.
 
 Then the illegal’s came by the tens of thousands.  
 
 Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services; small apartments are housing 5 families: you have to wait 6 hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor,  yourchild’s 2nd grade class is behind other schools because over half the class doesn’t speak English, Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box; I have to press “one” to hear my bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than “Old Glory” are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties.
 
 Maybe it’s time for the government to take down the bird feeder.

Confusing God’s Will with Our Own Will

Acts 16:13a – When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth

Have you ever wanted something so bad that you made your mind believe it was God’s will. I’m not saying like “I believe God wants me to buy a big yacht” or something like that. But possibly life altering decisions. Moving somewhere, going to a certain college, marrying someone at a specific time. I’m not saying that it isn’t God’s will, sometimes it is. But how do you know for sure? Recently I have struggled with these thoughts. Is this decision my will or God’s will? Are our wills conjoining or colliding? Well, as with any question, the answer is in the Word. One of my favorite verses actually has the answer, or how to get the answer actually. Funny how I didn’t think of that before…
James 1:5 says “If you need wisdom – if you want to know what God wants you to do – ask him, and He will gladly tell you. He will not resent your asking.
God wants us to ask! Sometimes I tend to fall into the thought process trap that life is like a game, and we have to strategize what is the next right move. But its not up to me at all! If I just ask God what I’m supposed to do, then guess what, he’ll answer! Simple as that.

So for this question of what to do next that is creeping up on the horizon rather quickly, I will go to the one who knows the answer. The One who is always right.